


Scientific Mindset

by Anonymous



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Science Bros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 08:51:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12207891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Momota tells Saihara about something new he learned while in astronaut training.





	Scientific Mindset

**Author's Note:**

  * For [corgasbord](https://archiveofourown.org/users/corgasbord/gifts).



Saihara came home to a warm, steaming meal of fried chicken and rice. Momota insisted on being helpful around the house, since Saihara made the lion’s share of their wages—astronaut school cost more than it paid.

 

Usually, Saihara would also get a drink in his usual mug with his meal, but sometimes, after a sweaty and humid day, a glass of hot water was best. As if on instinct, he reached for it and his hands came upon empty air.

 

“Momota-kun,” he asked. “Could I have a glass of water!”

 

“Sorry, no can do, pal. The water contains high levels of DHMO. It’s not safe for ya to drink. Hell, it's not safe for the environment!”

 

“DHMO’s? What are those?” Saihara remembers hearing about something like that, but chemical detection and investigation wasn't in his field of study. 

 

_ Momota-kun would probably know more about that _ . Saihara thought. He had to pass difficult tests in biology, chemistry, and physics to get accepted into the program.

 

“Oh, those have some seriously nasty fuckin’ effects. For example, they're a huge contributor to global warming, and are one of the major greenhouse gas trappers! Plus, they're even a component of acid rain, that melts all the important stonework shit Angie likes ta see.”

 

Saihara hums. “That does sound pretty dangerous.”

 

“It’s fuckin’ wild, isn't it!? I sure as hell didn't know about this, astronomy school teaches you some real shit goin’ down. They also told me that when factories release pollutants, there also huge amounts of DHMO’s in there! And it seeps into our water completely undetected! It’s crazy!”

 

Saihara could really go for a glass of water right now, but maybe not if the tap water is contaminated. He could get bottled, filtered water from the convenience store down the street…

 

“DHMO’s also have been linked to several serious strands of cancer! It’s in virtually every tumor, too! I don't know how more people don't know about this, the government’s probably doing some sorta fuck shit to hide it, man. It’s a fucking conspiracy! You gotta help me expose it with your detective skills!”

 

“Sure,” Saihara agrees. “I can ask Kimura-san from toxicology to help analyze the sample for you. What's the full scientific name of DHMO?”

 

“Oh, uh,” Momota fumbles, a hand to his head. “I’m pretty sure it was something like, uh, Dihydrogen Monoxide? Yeah, it was that for sure!”

 

A beat.

 

“S-Shuuichi, my brofriend, why ya lookin’ at me like that?”

 

Another beat.

 

Finally, Saihara lets out a long, world-weary sigh.

 

“Momota Kaito, you fucking idiot.”

 

“H-hey, what's that for?! This info’s completely legit, I’m telling you!” Momota gives him an annoyed glare.

 

Saihara closes his eyes and rubs his temples. “Dihydrogen. H-2. Two hydrogen molecules. Monoxide. One oxygen molecule. If you put that together, what formula does that make?”

 

Paling, Momota Kaito wipes the sweat from his face. It slowly begins to take on a purplish hue, and his teeth chatter in fear and dismay.

 

_ “WAIT, IS DIHYDROGEN MONOXIDE JUST FUCKIN’ WATER?!” _


End file.
